Within Me Without Me

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

life is good!

some good updates.........

so sadie is finally settling in. she still cries when i leave, but composes herself a lot sooner. and yesterday, they reported she didn't cry at all in the afternoon, even after she woke up from her nap! she has started talking more and more there, too. she talks all the time at home, but rarely did at school, i guess because she was too upset. so that's a good sign. so i feel better about that. and of course, aidan is doing better again too. he is such a big boy.

and in other news....

i just got a promotion!!!!

i'm now a supervisor in the placement unit, where we have probationers in treatment facilities.

i hope you're not offended that i didn't write my usual posts about interviewing and please send me good vibes and here's how i did, and oh well i'll get 'em next time. i was tired of sounding like a broken record, and thought maybe i was jinxing myself.

but wow!! i'm so excited. i start in 2 weeks. but they already switched my payroll stuff, so i'll get my first new and improved paycheck the same week i start! i guess that's one benefit to having working in personnel for 2 years - friends in payroll!

so yay for me! yay for my kiddos.

yay for halloween tomorrow! hurray for cooler weather finally here! even though it will still be 80 today, at least it's getting down to 50 at night.... perfect weather, in my southern opinion.

have a great week!!!!

Friday, October 19, 2007

a few things

nothing like starting your day off by torturing your 2 children. i had to leave both of them in their classrooms, screaming their heads off. with sadie, i know she's just adjusting still, but it's not getting better. i bring her special blanket and her special puppy, but she is inconsolable. i peeked at her through the window a couple minutes after i left her, and she was no longer screaming, just a soft-but-steady tear-less waaaaaah. with this distressed look on her face that just breaks my heart. even while she plays with the toys and toddles around the room. just unhappy.

and aidan, who was doing so well, has regressed too. probably about half the time, he was to the point where he would run in to the room and forget to even kiss me goodbye. and now i have to practically push him into the room, and when i leave he throws himself on the ground and wails. he eventually stops, the teacher is telling me, but it still is hard on me to watch.

did i make the wrong decision to have them in daycare? were we tons better off with cha cha watching them at home? which is better - them at home with cha cha but spoiled to death, or them in daycare interacting w/other kids but unhappy?

Friday, October 12, 2007

sometimes they figure it out all on their own!

so this morning i was in a growly mood. i was running late, and trying to get myself and the kids up, dressed, fed, make lunches, etc. i've been getting to work later and later these days. and part of what gets me fuming is that i'm running and gunning to get three people out the door, and jerry gets to poke along and get just himself ready to go in a leisurely way, spending his 15 minutes in the bathroom, getting out of bed after i'm already up, showered and dressed, etc. but i bite my tongue. who has time for an argument, anyway? so instead i was just snippy with him, figuring he'd get the message anyway. a strategy that rarely works, and only results in him saying at some point, "what the hell is wrong with you today? what did i do?" which i probably deserve.

so i was feeling a little guilty this morning as i was driving in, that i left him without a kiss and with a snarl on my face, but still not too happy about the getting ready in the morning work load distribution.

but he called me, and after some civil conversation, he actually said, well maybe if i get my butt in gear and help with some of the getting the kids ready in the morning, you'd be able to get out of the house a little earlier....

wow! great idea! and then i was glad i didn't go ahead and point that fact out in a very ugly and sarcastic tone like i was going to. one fight successfully avoided.

now we'll just have to wait and see if it actually happens. and i'll try not to say that to him in that sarcastic tone that i use way too often.....

Monday, October 08, 2007

another difficult day

so my big girl sadie started daycare today. i'm a little less worried about her than i was about aidan. she never has done the total meltdown thing like he did, and she was a little less spoiled by cha cha....

she did cry this morning though. clutched at my neck and knees, with big fat tears and stomping her little feet. man this is hard.

i called a few minutes ago, and she's not screaming anymore (she's been there for about an hour and a half) but she will play a little, then whimper and cry a little, then play some more. i hope she eats well. that should help.

she is actually only 16 months and they have her in the 18 month to 24 month classroom. which originally was a mistake, but since she doesn't use a pacifier or drink from a bottle, and is walking and talking, i think she'll be fine. better, actually, because i don't want her regressing to needing a bottle again. and she is pretty tough, having 3 older brothers and all. and usually pretty outgoing and gregarious. the only thing i worry about with her in with the (barely) older kids is that she'll nap on a mat instead of in a crib, which she's never done. but then again, neither had aidan, and it never bothered him.

friday was really really hard, being cha cha's last day and all. she held it together pretty well until she gave me back her set of house keys. then she teared up, and i did too. aidan had stayed home sick from school that day too. so at least she got to spend all day with both of them. i told her we'll visit her often, hopefully every week. i don't want the kids to not know her. or miss her too much.

anyway, send some prayers and good vibes my way! help me make it through the day!

Thursday, October 04, 2007

the name game

found this meme at aimee's place - love it!

1. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet & current car)
Molly Odyssey - i'd pay to see her!

2.YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (fave ice cream flavor, favorite cookie)
chunky monkey peanut butter. hell to the yea!

3. YOUR “FLY Guy/Girl” NAME:(first letter of first name, first three letters of last name)
C-Dav (my stepson jokingly refers to himself as "A-Dav." how sad is that?)

4. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal)
Pink Puppy. (Pink Panther's understudy?)

5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born)
Marie Seattle. yuk.

6. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first)
Davcar. hhmm. doesn't sound as sexy as aimee's. or han solo.

7. SUPERHERO NAME: (”The” + 2nd favorite color, favorite drink)
The Red Diet Coke! mmmm. not so much confidence in my planet-saving abilities.

8. NASCAR NAME: (the first names of your grandfathers)
John Roger. hell, that sounds fast!!

10.WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother’s & father’s middle names )
Kay Theodore. i like that better than the soap opera name!

11. TV WEATHER ANCHOR NAME: (Your 5th grade teacher’s last name, a major city that starts with the same letter)
Johnson Joplin. i like it!

12. SPY NAME: (your favorite season/holiday, flower)
Summer Daisy. i get to be the one who pretends to be a ditzy blonde, all the while collecting important dark secrets!

13. CARTOON NAME: (favorite fruit, article of clothing you’re wearing right now + “ie” or “y”)

Cantaloupe Pantsy. sounds fun, right?

14. HIPPIE NAME: (What you ate for breakfast, your favorite tree)
Granola Bar Oak. right on, i am a true hippie!

15. YOUR ROCKSTAR TOUR NAME: (”The” + Your fave hobby/craft, fave weather element + “Tour”)
The collapsing on the couch thunderstorm tour! i know that speaks to the teenage audience and the parent audience - i should have record sales.

tell me if you did this too in comments, i want to check you out.

Wednesday, October 03, 2007

saturday fun here in houston

I'm taking the kids here saturday - you can't argue with free! plus it looks cool!

the other day, i went to the Mad Potter with my sister and her kids. What a cool place! you pick which piece of pottery you want to paint, they provide the paint and brushes, and when you're done, they keep it and fire it, and you pick it up 5 days later, all glazed and microwave/oven safe. cool. lucy made some magnets and she helped me with a pumpkin. katie made a picture frame, stamped with lorelei's feet. turned out very cute. anyway, i want to take the kiddos there too. maybe we'll fit it in on saturday too after the museum.