Within Me Without Me

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

do you know anyone who is......


A few clowns short of a circus.
A few fries short of a happy meal.
The wheel's spinning, but the hamster's dead.
Slipped into the gene pool when the lifeguard wasn't
All foam, no beer.
The butter has slipped off his pancake.
The cheese slid off his cracker.
Body by Fisher, brains by Mattel.
Warning: Objects in mirror are dumber than they appear.
Couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the
He fell out of the stupid tree and hit every branch on the
way down.
As smart as bait.
Doesn't have all his dogs on one leash.
Her sewing machine's out of thread.
One fruit loop shy of a full bowl.
Her antenna doesn't pick up all the channels.
His belt doesn't go through all the loops.
Proof that evolution CAN go in reverse.
Receiver is off the hook.
Not wired to code.
Skylight leaks a little.
Her slinky's kinked.
Too much yardage between the goal posts.
Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold
them together.
A photographic memory, but the lens cover is on.
During evolution his ancestors were in the control group.
Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train
isn't coming.
Is so dense, light bends around her.
If brains were taxed, he'd get a rebate.
Standing close to her, you can hear the ocean.
Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, but he just
She stayed on the Tilt-A-Whirl a bit too long.
If brains were dynamite, he wouldn't have enough to blow
his nose.

Tell me your one-liners for those smart-as-dirt coworkers or acquaintances you have!!


  • At 4:22 PM, Blogger Mayogi said…

    Oh, this is so funny!!!! Thanks for sharing!

    Take care and God bless!

  • At 6:50 PM, Blogger Aimee said…

    OK - still laughing at the "couldn't pour water out of a boot" one . . . that's great, I'm going to steal it and use it with abandon :)

  • At 12:05 PM, Blogger Kelli in the Mirror said…

    Dare I say... two sandwiches short of pig meat? Remember that? :)


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